I live a life in fear that others won’t like me the way I am. Hell, I don’t like who I am at the moment. When I was 16-19 I was a massive 120kg. I hated my body. I felt and appeared to myself as disgusting. Truth to the weight gain? I lost my father, ate large meals, lost interest in things I liked, got way too comfortable in my relationship and eventually got lazier and lazier. The depression, fear my boyfriend would leave me and that I wouldn’t be able to have a family one day was the motivation for me to get my ass into gear. I searched online for hours for the best workouts and how to loose weight fast. Going to the gym wasn’t even an option for me as I have bad social anxiety and can’t run and flop around like a sweaty betty in front of anyone. I have tried nearly everything, and found what worked best for me and I went at it. Everyday. Occasionally have the weekend off for rest but I would feel guilty and lazy. I am now nearly 22 and 60kg. looking at the difference on the scales is great, I fit into smaller clothes, cool. But I have no confidence. My body isn’t anywhere near where I thought it would be. I have excess skin everywhere and it won’t go away unless I spend thousands on surgery. I actually feel worse now with body issues than I did before. All this hard work to be left feeling unhappy with myself and insecure in my relationship. I have lost motivation for a while now. I wish I could have the confidence and be happy with what and who I am but I’m not there yet.