Drugs are bad… Mmm Kay?

I don’t have time nor sympathy for drug users.
My family has been set on fire from drugs consuming my sister.
I’ll go back a bit so you understand my complete disapproval for drugs.
My sister has always smoked pot, yes it is still a drug, yes it is a bad drug but it is nothing compared to ICE and the effects it has on individuals and their loved ones.
She was married, had 3 beautiful kids and a house they built. She also never had to cook or work as her husband went above and beyond for her. She hid her drug habits from us for over 3 years. In the end she got sloppy, and eventually got caught out. I remember my brother in law having to call in for work because she would still be out galavanting around town at 5am when he had to leave for work, but he couldn’t just leave his kids at home. No, you would expect their loving mother to be there. Still telling us, her ‘family’ lies and lies and more lies. I will say the excuses got pretty good though, like “I can’t come home tonight, my drug dealer needs moral support as he lost his daughter.” – Good, I am relieved he lost his daughter. She is now with her mother, not getting abused by their drug dealing dead-beat dad.
It’s almost as if that life, that I am sure a lot of woman would have killed for wasn’t good enough for her. She likes having no responsibilities. It is now over 12 months since she got kicked out. It may seem like we were cruel to just push her away from an outsiders perspective but we offered help, multiple times. She has betrayed us in so many unforgiving ways (all because of her using ICE).  Her main excuse for doing this and acting this way is because we lost our father 5 years ago. She didn’t start using till 2 years later, but any excuse will do. See, she is so addicted, her own children can’t draw her back to reality. She doesn’t miss them, it is so heartbreaking. The eldest is 9, then theres a 7 year old and 6 year old. Both the youngest are still so confused about the situation. The eldest has just shut himself off from talking to anyone. He keeps things to himself, they definitely miss their mum and it is so fucked this has happened to them.
My brother in law was suicidal to start with from what she was putting him through, blaming him for the death of our father (untrue), leaving him to pay all the bills, raise the kids, cook, clean and to keep her unappreciative ass happy.
She never sees them anymore, never calls or messages. We might get the odd threat from her saying they are her kids and we can’t keep them from her. Funny thinning is we aren’t keeping them from her. No she isn’t allowed to take the kids anywhere on her own or drive in the car with them. These are the only terms which are reasonable, considering she can’t be trusted with the kids on her own anymore. Drugs come above and before everything else in her world. The kids dad was kept from his father as a child, and he ended up and blamed his mum for it which is why he can’t bring himself to cut her off completely. It’s so hard though. Seeing her kids every 5-6 months for 15 minutes isn’t enough. I have expressed this to my brother in law, that it is hurting and confusing the kids more by letting them see her the way she is, I bet they feel neglected. A feeling no kid should feel about their parents. I love them like they are my own, I have since the minute they were born.
All I can do now is show them the love they deserve.
I always looked up to my sister when I was young. She is 8 years older than me. She was my role model, someone for me to look up to, aspire to be. Well, didn’t that ship sink quick. I don’t feel sorry for her. She had a loving family and all the support she wanted. It just wasn’t good enough. If your own children can’t draw you back in, then what will?
I swear this drug Ice has just plagued everyone. It’s a destructive drug that kills people, makes them gouge their own eyes out.

XOXO DAISEYDROPPER

 

(Picture sourced from Pinterest)
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3 thoughts on “Drugs are bad… Mmm Kay?

  1. I am so sorry your family is having to go through this, especially the kids. I don’t understand why some people are more susceptible to drugs than others. Sounds like she’s in a very dark place that she can’t get out of and maybe doesn’t want to.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s a painful reality for the kids. They are all that matter.
      I know myself the pain she has put me through but they have yet to come to understand abandonment, and all the horrible emotions they must be feeling not because mum doesn’t want them, but because drugs are in some inhumane way better than they are.
      I’ll try my very best to make sure they come out of this strong and happy. Thanks for reading.
      Xoxo DaiseyDropper

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Daisey, I think if you drill it into their heads that drug abuse is like a poison or a devil that infiltrates a person and has nothing to do with their worth, as well as love them as it seems you do, they’ll hopefully be able to understand that as they grow older. Hang in there, dear. And keep writing. It’s therapeutic.

        Like

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